I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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