She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
