I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
