windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
