Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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