He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
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