hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
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