Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
