I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
We have started to decorate penises.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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