in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
