sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Randomize
