At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize