I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
one might say we're banned from that church
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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