She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
