i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
