Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
