So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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