ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize