is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
