Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
