no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize