my mouth tastes like poor choices
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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