is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
