haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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