I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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