HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
