There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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