It's just like the Real World with babies
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
