You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
