You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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