I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
