worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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