I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize