whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
