The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
