you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Randomize
