What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
