I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
