your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
