i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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