dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Enjoy the penises
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
