I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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