It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Just high enough for therapy.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Randomize
