so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Randomize