I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
