Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize