i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
