I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
