We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
