After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
